“You must be the change you wish to see in the world” Mahatma Ghandi
I want to share with you what I have learned about coaching and why you do not NEED a coach. When I began my coaching practice, I learned how to be a coach by going to coaching school. I learned how to ask questions and to keep asking questions. I learned how to put aside my own story and be there for the person I was coaching. I overcame my impulse to solve their problems because I am a fantastic problem solver and surely this was what coaching was all about wasn’t it? Passing on my distilled wisdom from my years of making stunning failures and then recovering; changing direction when I needed to and learning from others all about personal development and then applying it in my own life.
Part of learning to coach was to find some people who would be willing to be my practice coachees. And so I embarked on being the best darned coach you could ever hope to experience. Looking back I am so grateful to these people who volunteered to help me hone my coaching skills. At the end of that I was give a certificate and I was officially an Executive Coach.
The next part of my journey was to go out to the world and evangelise about how coaching can help. I met up with my old colleagues and lots of friends and I told them how excited I was to have learned and graduated and how much I could help them. That everyone needs coaching – if only I could get them to see.
What I have learned through helping others is the there are only so many areas of coaching and that each and every one of us already have the tools and capabilities to make things happen. These are:
Career Coaching to help people develop their career goals and then to succeed. Even if you are unsure your career goals, a career coach will work closely with you in order to help you determine where you would like your career to go and to develop a plan for achieving those goals.
Leadership Coaching to get the most out of your team: Be very clear about where you are going and why; help others see your vision; set clear objectives and help others achieve and you are en effective leader.
Business Coaching to make more money: focus on the most important revenue generating activities in your business; look after your customers and your team; stop wasting time on non-revenue generating activities and your business will be a resounding success.
Productivity Coaching to get more stuff done: This can be boiled down to several areas of practice: learn how to prioritise and focus; be assertive and learn to say no to yourself when you want to be distracted and to others who place demands on you when you have other more important things to do.
Relationship Coaching to improve how you show up: treat your significant others (work colleagues, employees, customer, friends, family and partners) how you want to be treated and your relationships will also flourish.
Life Coaching for a happier, more fulfilling life: Stop living your life by others values and start living them according to your own core values; if you don’t know whether you are or not ask yourself this important question: What is important to me and how am I living according to that? If your answer clearly identifies you are living a life on purpose then continue doing that and do more of it. If not then stop doing that and start living according to your principles. You will be happier.
Health coaching to lose weight, get fitter so that you gain confidence: Ask yourself “is what I am eating healthy?”; “Am I moving enough?”; “Am I living with bad habits that make me unhealthy?”. Let’s face it we are smart. We do know when what we are doing is unhealthy and it is up to us to make changes that improve things for ourselves.
As human beings, we are gifted with an amazing ability to learn. We are the only ones who can make a difference in our lives. It is us that decides when we want to change or when we want to make an improvement. A coach will not be able to create a change in your mindset or your principles or your practices – you are the only one who can do that. And there are libraries of books; innumerable websites, blogs, podcasts and advice free available on the internet where you can find out how to go about improving things for yourself.
“You do not need a coach to help you learn and grow – you can already do that for yourself. What you want a coach for is to help you apply your learning so that you can reach your goals faster!” – Rachel Hill
What a coach will do is:
- believe in you, consistently and without judgement
- challenge your world view and get you to dig deeper than you ever have
- help you integrate what you have learned and put it into practice
- ask you more questions than you have ever been asked to stimulate deeper understanding
- listen to you deeply and without judgement
- be there when you try and fail and help you to learn to build resilience because it is through making mistakes and failing that we learn and grow
- tell you when you are ready to fly and encourage you to move on
- be honest with you and say when they don’t know but are prepared to learn along with you
- have the courage to walk alongside you every step of the way
- be your biggest champion and cheerleader
- provide you with a safe place where you can focus on you and be who you truly are whilst you explore and grow
- be prepared to invest in their own growth and development by having their own coach
If you want a coach that is an altogether different thing. Wanting to work with a coach means you are ready to make those changes you dream of and will commit to doing whatever it takes to take your life to the next level and that you are looking for someone to take that journey with you. Finding the right coach… well that is a topic for another post.
Get in touch with me if you would like to talk about your career change or job transition.